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Is There a Positive Place for Porn? Part 5 of 5 Part Series

The reaction to this short series on porn has been so interesting. Some have been uncomfortable I’ve spent so much time on the topic, others don’t think I have gone far enough, a few think I am too condemning while some think I’ve been to easy on the industry. As I’ve stated before, I am not afraid of differences. I invite different points of view. I view my place as one who starts the conversation and gives you something to think about personally and to talk about with those in your life.

 

The porn industry and its place in our life is complicated and conflictual. People’s experience and thoughts of pornography hits all emotions and opinions. In this series, I’ve touched on some of the negative and cautionary aspects of pornography. In this last article, I’m going to broach the positive signs to pornography.

 

In previous articles, I discussed my disdain for the porn warehouses like youporn and pornhub. I get their purpose and draw but if I’m hitting the positive aspects of porn, they are not on my list for recommendations.

 

Positive Aspects of Porn:

  • There are sites out there, such as beautifulagony, that are not incredibly graphic but give a realistic view of how diverse individuals seek, experience and communicate pleasure. I find those to be positive because they are consensual by nature, reportedly equal in compensation and in picking applicants, and celebrate pleasure. Positive porn, in my view, is realistic, treats the person(s) being viewed respectfully and equally and celebrates pleasure.
  • Some porn shows a variety of body types engaging in sex and celebrates the right for all individuals to seek pleasure in their lives. In viewing porn that shows images or videos of all body types engaging in sexual activity, you can open yourself up to bias and expose yourself to a wider range of acceptance of bodies and attraction.

In the training I did for AASECT certification, I sat with a group of people and watched two days of pornography and discussed all aspects of the industry. One of the films was of a couple who had cerebral palsy. It highlighted a discussion with the couple about the challenges they faced with their sexual interactions, showed an interview with the care providers who helped them physically to have sex and then showed sexual activity between them. Our group found the film so important in dispelling myths and reminding many of us what we take for granted in our sexual lives.

  • Along the line of body types, I support pornography that shows a variety of real genitals. Our society is really lacking appropriate education on a healthy view of how varied our genitals look and how they age typically. Of course some porn sites only show ‘preferred’ genital specifications (symmetrical, small lipped vulva and long and wide girthed penises) but there are sites and production companies how use only ‘real’ actors.

I work with my mentors Betty Dodson and Carlin Ross with BodySex which works to dispel the distorted view of pleasure, orgasm and female bodies. They have filmed BodySex workshops and have a variety of short videos that show authentic sexual experiences and pleasure with a variety of body types and women. The website is www.dodsonandross.com.

  • Fetish sites can give individuals the ability to ‘experience’ or test their interests in a safe environment. Of course, there are negative sites but there are also communities that support educative atmospheres.

https://fetlife.com

  • Some pornography can help trigger fantasy ideas and can create arousal that enhances someone’s sexual life or desire.
  • There is a rise in feminist porn that purports or provides porn that caters towards images and videos that does not depict scenes that degrade women or the actors involved.   Here are a few articles that highlights some of them.

https://www.bustle.com/articles/10042-feminist-porn-101-your-guide-to-empowering-sexytimes

http://www.feministpornguide.com/sites.html

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/best-porn-for-women-online_us_564f71f9e4b0258edb316a5a

 

As I wrap up this series, I want to thank everyone who had the courage to comment privately or publically. I decided to write a 5 part series because of the amount of questions I get about the topic. I couldn’t fit it into one article and I wanted to honor all the questions and topics I’ve been given the past few months. This isn’t an easy topic and it can be difficult to allow yourself to ask the questions I posed this week and to examine where you fall on the topics I raised. I loved reading your stories and answering your questions. Through the decades I’ve been doing this work, I feel so gratified when someone tells me they’ve never thought of something I bring up or state no one has ever asked them to think about a topic. I am not in the business of telling you what to think or what to do but I do want to help aid you in becoming YOUR own (s)expert however that looks and feels. Thank you for honoring me with your journey and stories.

Xoxo Dr. Juliana

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